Ch..Ch...Ch..Changes...

It has been a while since I posted. There have been numerous reasons behind my absence. I have been swamped for one. Spreading my time between three cities, and balancing work, school, family, and the seemingly endless lines of errors that pop up in my margin for errorless life. The most important reason was that I just didn't have any pleasant or fun things to blog about. Dealing with sick parents although likely something all must face at one point or another, is nothing glamorous or humorous even if humor can sometimes be found it isn't the type one shares with others.

Understanding Found

I dated a person for a while and after it was over I couldn't understand why God had made our paths cross. Even though I firmly believe that everything happens for a reason I didn't understand this one person that treaded so destructively on my heart and what his true purpose was. He has been out of my life for three years. It took three years to find the answer... It was about who he would introduce me to. For they have become extremely important in my life and I hope they will remain for far longer than the one I dated, actually I not only hope for it, I know they will.

Improvements Made

Today was the first day I had seen my mom in almost two weeks. She has been in rehab during this time. I went to see her today with some trepidation. The last time I went to see her after listening to my dad say things were ok or improved, I was shocked at the state of the situation. Today I was pleasantly surprised. She can eat without assistance, when she wants to. She doesn't always want to eat but she can do it. She couldn't when I left. She moves much more than she did before. She will move her feet around while she is sitting and move her arms around. I have been told she will stand with some assistance but she is doing more and more of it herself. And I believe we will see her taking steps in the next few weeks. Things are not as bleak as they were when I left.

Priorities Shift

I have always considered myself a loner. I have great friends. I have always kept the circle small and refined. That has changed, and I have seen what an asset I have in the friends I have in the inner circle and opened the circle to many more. I have been quite blessed to be surrounded by incredible people at work, school, in personal settings, and through networks of those.

Work though still important to me, in a three week period of time, stopped defining me. I love my company, they have been incredible to me and providing me with contacts that have significantly impacted my life such as D squared. I connected my work and company too closely to my identity. That is no longer the case.

Between watching the health issues with my mom and years of conversations with Aileen, my own health has become a priority like never before. In the last five months I have lost 25 pounds. Inspired by Aileen, I rejoined the gym last week. I have refocused on this because I never want to be in a hospital thinking I might have prevented it by just using common sense.

I am burned out on school. Two years into the program, I have two quarters and three weeks to go and I tired. I have never been so glad in my life that I have done something. This accomplishment will be sweet. To finish the program and get the sheepskin will be amazing, but none of that compares to the group of people that have touched my life through this program. A list far to long to write here, but one that I will pray for regularly and that I will smile while they accomplish great things and make simply amazing lives for themselves and their families.

Speaking of families, I've found I'm ready. Ready to settle down. Ready to commit. Ready to find the one. Ready in a way I have never felt before in my life. This doesn't mean I am desperate. Nor does it mean I am hunting the one down. I'm just open to it like I haven't been for a very long time.