Someone lit a fire under some administrator's behind and they have decided its time for mom to go to rehab. They decided this today and she has to go tomorrow. Now...personally I think the insurance company is behind this because they don't want her in there over another weekend. I'm not a big fan of the insurance company. Why? Because the rehab center that my mom was in a year ago after the first set of strokes still has not been paid!! We found this out in March when she was back in the hospital and had to go to rehab again and they would not take her because they hadn't been paid. I wasn't a happy camper about this then either. That rehab center complained to who ever one complains to in the Federal Government about this and the insurance company was told to pay the bill. Several months later, they still have not paid said bill. So my mom's care suffers. I'm irritated.
My dad called me today while I was at work in a meeting. He is one of the few calls that I don't screen out during meetings. But today when he called with this it sent me into a bit of a tailspin and I went back into the meeting and remained silent because I was afraid someone might get their head handed to them to no fault of their own.
What really gets me is that so many people don't have insurance and can't get decent care, but even if you have insurance, that still doesn't guarantee you decent care. Because even though the insurance company will drop you if you don't pay your bills on time, there seems to be no incentive or even requirement that they do their share in any type of timely fashion.
The irritation gets worse when I consider that while my employer at one time had their own health insurance division, they sold in the last few years. To who? The freakin' company that isn't paying my mom's rehab bills!
19 July 2007
18 July 2007
My dear friend Leaners has pointed out to me that yelling "Look I have shingles" may not be in my best interest. Which is just fricken hysterical to me! You have a point!
I found out today I am not traveling next week. I may actually be able to sleep in my own bed for a few days.
Seems mom had a better day today. We have gone through a week of refusing to eat, refusing to take her pills, and refusing to work with the therapists. Oh and a week of not really speaking. Today was better. She ate real food and spoke to my dad, not much but she did speak. I'm still worried about Dad. I can hear the fatigue in his voice. Just need to get to October and the house being done and they can move in and I can help more. If it doesn't make marked improvements soon, I may need to take some time off work and help out. I'm trying to avoid that after last July and taking nearly a month and a half off. I spend three months after that cleaning up the messes I created trying to keep up with work during that time. I have less on my plate this time around. I'm not in school, I'm not driving to Chicago or flying to Chicago every weekend. But there were benefits to that. Every Saturday I could divorce myself from the entire thing. I'm not as overwhelmed this year, I don't think. There's different kind of stuff on the plate this year.
I found out today I am not traveling next week. I may actually be able to sleep in my own bed for a few days.
Seems mom had a better day today. We have gone through a week of refusing to eat, refusing to take her pills, and refusing to work with the therapists. Oh and a week of not really speaking. Today was better. She ate real food and spoke to my dad, not much but she did speak. I'm still worried about Dad. I can hear the fatigue in his voice. Just need to get to October and the house being done and they can move in and I can help more. If it doesn't make marked improvements soon, I may need to take some time off work and help out. I'm trying to avoid that after last July and taking nearly a month and a half off. I spend three months after that cleaning up the messes I created trying to keep up with work during that time. I have less on my plate this time around. I'm not in school, I'm not driving to Chicago or flying to Chicago every weekend. But there were benefits to that. Every Saturday I could divorce myself from the entire thing. I'm not as overwhelmed this year, I don't think. There's different kind of stuff on the plate this year.
16 July 2007
15 July 2007
Groceries
While I was in school, Ryan and I had a number of conversations about the toxicity of Wal-Mart to Mom and Pop shops. I'm not a fan of Wal-Mart, no major insight there. I have had friends who work for them and I can respect what they have accomplished in a tough market, but I don't have to like the business tactics.
Ok, so on with the story. There is a little corner grocery store that since the day I moved to town I have frequented. Even when I started looking for a house, I wanted to stay close to where my apartment was because of the corner store and the comfort I had found in the area. The corner grocery has changed hands many times during my almost 10 years here. And I have always wondered why anyone buys it because I can't imagine it makes much money. Anyway, since I am rarely home, it is a good place for me to pick up the few items that I need to tide me over until the next trip. So today I stopped in to pick up some veggies and such. The two women in the check out in front of me wrote checks for their items. I don't write checks except to the kid who mows my lawn. I don't carry a checkbook. And watching the regime required to pay with a check confirmed that was a good decision. The line was quite long by the time I got to the front of the line. And though I only had a few items, it consisted of wild diet cherry pepsi and lots of veggies that didn't have bar codes! The poor kid, I felt bad for him because there was a long line and he obviously was new. I couldn't find the price for the garlic. He had to ask me if my yam was in fact a yam. And he didn't know what type of onion I was buying. I felt uncomfortable for him. We finally got through it and I think he was relieved to see me pull out the debit card.
I was thinking to myself I probably would have been annoyed had this happened at Target or Wal-Mart, but it was amusingly endearing for it to happen at my corner store.
Ok, so on with the story. There is a little corner grocery store that since the day I moved to town I have frequented. Even when I started looking for a house, I wanted to stay close to where my apartment was because of the corner store and the comfort I had found in the area. The corner grocery has changed hands many times during my almost 10 years here. And I have always wondered why anyone buys it because I can't imagine it makes much money. Anyway, since I am rarely home, it is a good place for me to pick up the few items that I need to tide me over until the next trip. So today I stopped in to pick up some veggies and such. The two women in the check out in front of me wrote checks for their items. I don't write checks except to the kid who mows my lawn. I don't carry a checkbook. And watching the regime required to pay with a check confirmed that was a good decision. The line was quite long by the time I got to the front of the line. And though I only had a few items, it consisted of wild diet cherry pepsi and lots of veggies that didn't have bar codes! The poor kid, I felt bad for him because there was a long line and he obviously was new. I couldn't find the price for the garlic. He had to ask me if my yam was in fact a yam. And he didn't know what type of onion I was buying. I felt uncomfortable for him. We finally got through it and I think he was relieved to see me pull out the debit card.
I was thinking to myself I probably would have been annoyed had this happened at Target or Wal-Mart, but it was amusingly endearing for it to happen at my corner store.
Balance
I'm 36 now. Had a birthday a few weeks ago and entered that lovely two month period of time every year when I am in fact an number higher in age than Aileen. A fact she reminded me of in my birthday card! Which made ma laugh mind you, but remember August 13th is right around the corner and one of these days I'm going to figure out how to put pink flamingos in your front your for your birthday from half way across the country!
As I think back on this last year that had really high highs and really low lows, I realize the importance of balance in life. It is not something I have always succeeded at providing in my life, in fact, it is quite the opposite. I get focused like a train on tracks. Work and school, and sick family, etc...I juggle and multi-task and the world keeps spinning and sometimes I step back and look at it and wonder what the heck I'm doing.
I think when Mom went in the hospital last week it sent me in a bit of a tailspin. I still think I deserve an oscar for getting through the week without having any type of meltdown. Only my boss knew about it and probably wouldn't have told him had we not spent an hour and a half on the phone while he drove to St. Louis for our meeting on Thursday. Speaking of which, I know I have mentioned how much I love my new boss, but Thursday was a classic example of why he and I get along so well. The supplier gave us headsets so we could hear what the tour guide was saying on the tour. So we let him go off with our other collegue and held back and he spoke what was literally in my head, "These are cool, we can hear him and hang back here and talk." We spent most of the tour trading comments about the factory floor which wouldn't have been nearly as funny as it was since the sarcasm was running pretty deep that day. It was actually a productive meeting, until McBossy left and the plant manager decided that would be a good time to take a chunk out of my backside. Underestimating me, amuses me.
Dad and I are having conversations about putting mom in a home permanently. This decision, these conversations I think are some of the most difficult I have ever had. Heavens know there have been a series of relationships good and bad that have passed through my life and ending those was never easy. But this decision is on an entirely different level than any I have had before. It has brought me to my knees crying and trying to think about what I would want in her shoes. But the decision sends ripples through the rest of the family. Those closest will feel the ripples the most which causes a lot of concern about Dad.
Balance is precarious...and in my experience...fleeting...I gotta work on that.
As I think back on this last year that had really high highs and really low lows, I realize the importance of balance in life. It is not something I have always succeeded at providing in my life, in fact, it is quite the opposite. I get focused like a train on tracks. Work and school, and sick family, etc...I juggle and multi-task and the world keeps spinning and sometimes I step back and look at it and wonder what the heck I'm doing.
I think when Mom went in the hospital last week it sent me in a bit of a tailspin. I still think I deserve an oscar for getting through the week without having any type of meltdown. Only my boss knew about it and probably wouldn't have told him had we not spent an hour and a half on the phone while he drove to St. Louis for our meeting on Thursday. Speaking of which, I know I have mentioned how much I love my new boss, but Thursday was a classic example of why he and I get along so well. The supplier gave us headsets so we could hear what the tour guide was saying on the tour. So we let him go off with our other collegue and held back and he spoke what was literally in my head, "These are cool, we can hear him and hang back here and talk." We spent most of the tour trading comments about the factory floor which wouldn't have been nearly as funny as it was since the sarcasm was running pretty deep that day. It was actually a productive meeting, until McBossy left and the plant manager decided that would be a good time to take a chunk out of my backside. Underestimating me, amuses me.
Dad and I are having conversations about putting mom in a home permanently. This decision, these conversations I think are some of the most difficult I have ever had. Heavens know there have been a series of relationships good and bad that have passed through my life and ending those was never easy. But this decision is on an entirely different level than any I have had before. It has brought me to my knees crying and trying to think about what I would want in her shoes. But the decision sends ripples through the rest of the family. Those closest will feel the ripples the most which causes a lot of concern about Dad.
Balance is precarious...and in my experience...fleeting...I gotta work on that.
11 July 2007
Not just a bad day
Latest news comes while I'm having a business dinner. Dad called. Mom had another stroke and is back in the hospital. I get an Oscar for surviving dinner with no one being the wiser.
In the shadow of the arch...
I'm in St. Louis. I have a fabalous view of the arch from my hotel room. I went to a supplier that I didn't have in my old job. New processes, materials....it was sweet! I had a blast asking a billion questions. I have a bunch of parts to take back with me and I'm hoping to generate some cost reduction.
Shingle decision has been made... if only it had been as easy as typing that was. I had a long dinner last night so I didn't get all the samples out of the car. But today a decision had to be made because they are roofing tomorrow. (On a side note, I just looked at the ceiling of my hotel room. There are two heights in the room and the different heights have different size texturing. It looks .... odd.) After a long brainstorming session on Monday night regarding the colors of the house when I started looking at them again today I was on a bit of overwhelm. But I was coming down to the wire and needed to make a decision. So I called my dad....I knew instantly when he answered the phone things weren't going well. My mom refused to eat, take her pills, or do therapy today with the visiting nurses. I tried to tell day she is probably just having a day. She is probably just mad at the world and mad about her situation. Dad didn't sound like he was buying it and frankly I'm not sure I do either. Let's just pray tomorrow is a better day. I didn't talk to him about the shingles at that point but then once I was off the phone with him I couldn't concentrate enough to focus on the decision at hand which was still the stupid shingles which though seem trivial in the light of my mom's condition is a decision I have to live with until Uncle John moves me next. I called my brainstorming partner who also helped out with a few well timed laughs. Decision made...finally.
I'm off to dinner. Dolce Beijos.
Shingle decision has been made... if only it had been as easy as typing that was. I had a long dinner last night so I didn't get all the samples out of the car. But today a decision had to be made because they are roofing tomorrow. (On a side note, I just looked at the ceiling of my hotel room. There are two heights in the room and the different heights have different size texturing. It looks .... odd.) After a long brainstorming session on Monday night regarding the colors of the house when I started looking at them again today I was on a bit of overwhelm. But I was coming down to the wire and needed to make a decision. So I called my dad....I knew instantly when he answered the phone things weren't going well. My mom refused to eat, take her pills, or do therapy today with the visiting nurses. I tried to tell day she is probably just having a day. She is probably just mad at the world and mad about her situation. Dad didn't sound like he was buying it and frankly I'm not sure I do either. Let's just pray tomorrow is a better day. I didn't talk to him about the shingles at that point but then once I was off the phone with him I couldn't concentrate enough to focus on the decision at hand which was still the stupid shingles which though seem trivial in the light of my mom's condition is a decision I have to live with until Uncle John moves me next. I called my brainstorming partner who also helped out with a few well timed laughs. Decision made...finally.
I'm off to dinner. Dolce Beijos.
10 July 2007
How about a little politics....
I spent a few hours in a car today and when I wasn't singing like the car rock star I am, I was thinking. Don't say it I know that is a dangerous thing. Since politics is one of my favorite subjects let's talk politics.
I spent a few years of my life near Philly I have a little interest in the civil war...So let's consider a couple of facts that you can draw your own conclusions from because I'm not even sure what I will do with these yet...
Somewhere between 46,000 and 51,000 men were killed in the Battle of Gettysburg. It was a three day long war. General Lee attempted to resign after the battle, his resignation was declined.
3,609 Americans have died in the Iraq war, which has been going on for four years. Impeachment is being called for by some.
Presidential race:
Clinton: As much as I would love to have a female president and I believe the US is ready for a female president. I'm torn as to my beliefs of how it would be received by the rest of the world and how it would impact the power of "the office". My largest concern here has nothing to do with gender... As Americans, do we really want to have "the office" controlled by 2 families for over 20 years?
Obama: I like Obama, he is well spoken, impressive, and has the necessary presence required for the office. Now if it wouldn't take increasing the size of the government by 5 in order to support his programs, I think he would be a great candidate.
Edwards: Four years ago, Edwards was my fav. I have said it before, had he been at the top of the ticket, I would have actually had a decision to make in the last election. I don't think he is doing as good a job this time at connecting to the public. I think he presence and strength from the first campaign has been deserted to attempt a different strategy. I liked the first strategy better. He was more positive, maybe a bit more idealistic but with vision. I liked it.
On the other side of the fence:
Giuliani - He started way too early. He should have held out on his decision to run. Everyone knew he was going to run, there was no reason to start so early. I like Rudy and I think he would make a good president. However, he can't build his entire platform on 9-11.
McCain - Its over.
Thompson - The smartest of them all...he had stayed out of the race, but not really. He hasn't announced anything. He hasn't stated hardly any of his views. But he has everyone really curious. I will be disappointed if he announces in September. Still too early. Keep 'em guessing and wanting. I think he has a good shot because he is playing a smart game.
That was my thoughts for the day on politics.
I spent a few years of my life near Philly I have a little interest in the civil war...So let's consider a couple of facts that you can draw your own conclusions from because I'm not even sure what I will do with these yet...
Somewhere between 46,000 and 51,000 men were killed in the Battle of Gettysburg. It was a three day long war. General Lee attempted to resign after the battle, his resignation was declined.
3,609 Americans have died in the Iraq war, which has been going on for four years. Impeachment is being called for by some.
Presidential race:
Clinton: As much as I would love to have a female president and I believe the US is ready for a female president. I'm torn as to my beliefs of how it would be received by the rest of the world and how it would impact the power of "the office". My largest concern here has nothing to do with gender... As Americans, do we really want to have "the office" controlled by 2 families for over 20 years?
Obama: I like Obama, he is well spoken, impressive, and has the necessary presence required for the office. Now if it wouldn't take increasing the size of the government by 5 in order to support his programs, I think he would be a great candidate.
Edwards: Four years ago, Edwards was my fav. I have said it before, had he been at the top of the ticket, I would have actually had a decision to make in the last election. I don't think he is doing as good a job this time at connecting to the public. I think he presence and strength from the first campaign has been deserted to attempt a different strategy. I liked the first strategy better. He was more positive, maybe a bit more idealistic but with vision. I liked it.
On the other side of the fence:
Giuliani - He started way too early. He should have held out on his decision to run. Everyone knew he was going to run, there was no reason to start so early. I like Rudy and I think he would make a good president. However, he can't build his entire platform on 9-11.
McCain - Its over.
Thompson - The smartest of them all...he had stayed out of the race, but not really. He hasn't announced anything. He hasn't stated hardly any of his views. But he has everyone really curious. I will be disappointed if he announces in September. Still too early. Keep 'em guessing and wanting. I think he has a good shot because he is playing a smart game.
That was my thoughts for the day on politics.
09 July 2007
Waxing Nostalgia and Building the Future
OK....house time! Ready? Are ya sure? Here it is. Its small but its cozy. I can't wait for it to be done. I have to pick shingles because they are roofing on Thursday. This hasn't been an easy decision and it still isn't made.
I talked with Dan from school today. I sent him an email last week about the benefits of his job choice over mine....it went like this...first the subject line was "I wanna be like Dan."
If I worked in finance…
I could work banker's hours.
I could make money hand over fist and produce nothing tangible.
I go running over my lunch hour and still not sweat all afternoon.
I could live in great places on the coast near water.
I could sleep in my own bed every night.
But alas, I have chosen a much less glamorous path,
It's true, I make widgets instead. The whoa's of a widget maker…
We work tirelessly.
We don't make crap for salary. (its all in the bonus)
I work at my desk over lunch.
I live in the middle of no where with no water in sight.
And I spend more time in hotels than my own home.
But I gotta say I love it!!
So my post and Aileen's comment a few posts back got me thinking about Madtown and where people are now. Leener's...I have no idea why I looked him up but I looked him up along with a buncha other people...Paul is in Dublin, OH now! I have no idea what he is doing there, but that is where he is. I almost emailed Mattie to ask what he was doing there, but thought better of it. You know Mattie would tell Paul and Paul would go off on a ego trip about me pining for him still which even though it could not be further from the truth, the idea of him thinking it makes me vomit in my mouth.
JP the elder was in town from Mexico a week ago. And since I happened to be home part of the week, we went out for drinks. JP it was good to see you man! JP says, "you don't keep up on your blog anymore." What can I say I'm a busy girl! I will try harder to keep this up. But I expect comments, lotsa comments JP!
I talked with Dan from school today. I sent him an email last week about the benefits of his job choice over mine....it went like this...first the subject line was "I wanna be like Dan."
If I worked in finance…
I could work banker's hours.
I could make money hand over fist and produce nothing tangible.
I go running over my lunch hour and still not sweat all afternoon.
I could live in great places on the coast near water.
I could sleep in my own bed every night.
But alas, I have chosen a much less glamorous path,
It's true, I make widgets instead. The whoa's of a widget maker…
We work tirelessly.
We don't make crap for salary. (its all in the bonus)
I work at my desk over lunch.
I live in the middle of no where with no water in sight.
And I spend more time in hotels than my own home.
But I gotta say I love it!!
Dan...was on vacation last week and didn't receive this until today. He was at the beach last week. The beach. The life of those that chose finance. I may have to rethink this one day. Danny and I had a good laugh over this one. I miss Saturday morning breakfast at Gleacher with Danny and a bowl of apple juice oatmeal.
All right, night owl is going to bed. In my now chilly hotel room (a story for another night) thanks to the Steele man!
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